500 Words

My friend, writer Jeff Goins, challenges his audience to write 500 words.  I've been noodling the idea of writing a book and so I'll take the plunge.

I want to encourage parents everywhere that it is possible to raise godly children who follow Christ and excel in the things they put their minds to.  The world wants you to believe that rebellion is a given and that the teen years will be a nightmare.  Not so!  We raised two girls who did not rebel in any major ways.  Sure they experimented with alcohol, and pushed the boundaries, made occasional poor choices, and fought with each other; but, they were also high-school valedictorians, accepted early to college, and excelled in their colleges.  Today the younger one is entering her senior year at a Christian college and the older graduated from a prestigious school and is pursuing her dream of stage management.

How did we do it?  Consistency, love, firm boundaries, and faith integrated into every aspect of life is the short answer.  The long answer, well, that's a book.  Our family is very close, the sisters are best friends and mom is often their confidante.  And dad is their role model.  We were active in church and looked for opportunities for them to be mentored and discipled.  We walked out our faith as transparently as possible.  We chose a lifestyle of service and ministry and hospitality which created a place of vitality and we were part of a tribe of like-minded families.

But we also encouraged them to be independent and to think for themselves.  While we did many activities together as a family, and savored the moments, days, and years, we were not 'helicopter parents'.   Often I would hear other parents lament the burden of having children at home, as in "I can't wait for school to start" or "summer is too long."  I could not fully understand this mindset.  Our children are a gift and I was thankful for the time that I had with them.  I invested myself fully as a mom in all aspects of their development.  I encouraged them to develop interests and friendships outside the home, but made home a place they would want to come back to.

We instilled discipline in them from a young age without being harsh or overbearing.  We taught them to think, to discern, and to make decisions. We expected them to be responsible and resourceful. While we live a middle-class life, we taught them not to take privilege for granted, mostly by example and experience in the developing world. For a period of time, we homeschooled them.  We read aloud as a family well into their teen years.  We also read the Bible together and encouraged them to read and memorize Scripture.  We were involved in their faith development, not leaving it to the church.  We practiced thankfulness.

Oh and we ate dinner together as a family just about every night.

Want more?  Well, I guess you'll have to (wait for) and buy the book!

Sand Dollars and Sunsets in the PNW

Leaning Out Can Be a Form of Leaning In

I just finished Sheryl Sandberg's book Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead.

While I commend her for an insightful book on the world of women and work, I am not sure that I agree with everything in her book.  I found her viewpoint to be very biased toward the importance of women having a career.  Sheryl's book is an important manifesto for women in leadership and the role of women in society today.  She champions the cause of women in senior leadership and encourages and empowers women today.  Although I think this is an important cause, it is not the only role for women in society.  I believe that women can have it all and juggle family and career.

I realize that not all women have a choice and many must work; I was fortunate enough to be a stay-at-home mom for 13 years.  Our family made choices to move to places with lower cost of living and to live a more modest lifestyle.  After my girls reached middle school, I rejoined the workforce.  I believe that different seasons can lead to different choices.  I believe that those years at home with my children were an important contribution to society.  It is my opinion that the shaping of the lives of the next generation and the fabric of family is too important a task to leave to others.  

Although Sheryl might say that I "leaned out," I would disagree.  I leaned in - to different priorities.  I would not trade those years for anything.  They resulted in close relationships with my daughters who are now confident, happy, and productive young adults. 

The Beauty of Creation

Earth’s crammed with heaven
And every common bush afire with God: 
But only he who sees, takes off his shoes.

                              Elizabeth Barrett Browning 

On Writing Well

Tom Lake,  a writer for Sports Illustrated and an alum of my alma mater, Gordon College says, “We’re seeing this hunger among readers for long stories that really dig into something to find answers rather than just sticking to the surface—and they’re reading them on their iPhones."  I for one love to read the alumni magazines of several institutions that I support including Wheaton College, Gordon, and Seattle Pacific University because they have well-written and interesting stories.  And the articles are somewhat long.  But I enjoy the intellectual stimulation.  Good photography and graphics and visually interesting layout are important, but alone they do not provide enough to hold my attention.  These magazines provide an opportunity for institutions of Christian Higher Education to tell their story, to celebrate their impact on students and the world at large, to promote their vision.

Hard Eucharisteo

Once again I am wakeful between 2-3 a.m.  Clearly my brain is still processing all that has happened. This story could have had a different ending for my family. Would I still be giving thanks?
Eucharisteo. Charis: at its root grace and joy. Eucharisteo: giving thanks. In ALL things. This is what Ann Voskamp calls 'hard eucharisteo.'

When I first got the news of what was happening, I went straight to my knees. Since then, I've been on my knees several times in gratitude, in questioning, in praise, in lament, in worship. We MUST be on our knees for this generation.

An SPU prof expresses just how difficult it is to process all the emotions. Beautifully said. This campus community is so strong and so filled with charis.

As I chatted yesterday with a student on Eastern's campus, who coincidentally is also named Jenny, she remarked, 'we're not safe anywhere.'  My response was, "we're not safe anywhere, but we are safe everywhere in the arms of God. He will carry us through."

My final text to Gennie last night was "Go live life!"

Pray for SPU

Please join us in prayer for the students and families at Seattle Pacific University. There was a shooting on campus yesterday. One male student has died and a female student is in intensive care after undergoing surgery last night.

Those of you who knew our girls when they were small will remember that bagels were a staple in our home.  But for a bagel, Gennie might not be here today.  

Our daughter, Gennie, is a junior at SPU and texted us late yesterday afternoon. The text that no parent wants to get: 'I'm safe. There is a shooter on campus. We're in lockdown.' She was on her way to meet a friend in the building where the shooting happened when she stopped to get something to eat, a bagel. When she arrived the police were there with one of the victims. She described seeing a lot of blood. She sheltered with other students in the building across the street until the campus was secured. Her friend hid under a table and was spared.

We are thankful for Gennie's safety but heartbroken for the victims and families.

She texted me late last night saying how much homework she still had to do for U Scholars and how she needed to finish preparing for a one question essay test today - which we have been chatting about all week - the question is "What does it mean to be human?" - this was for U Scholars - a culmination of all their science, theology and philosophy of the past 3 years.  They are to write a maximum of one page. I had shared with her earlier this week about my current devotional readings in One Thousand Gifts about how the meaning of life is to glorify and honor God (from the Westminster Shorter Catechism) to see His beauty and glory all around us and about my readings in The Pursuit of God about how the veil of self keeps us from a fuller intimacy with God.

 I assured her that classes were to be cancelled today.  I imagine the question will take on new meaning in the light of yesterday's tragedy.

"but faith is always a way of seeing, a seeking for God in everything. And if the eyes gaze long enough to see God lifted in a thing, how can the lips not offer eucharisteo? The truly saved have eyes of faith and lips of thanks. Faith is in the gaze of a soul" Ann Voskamp

Please join us in praying for this CCCU school and the students and families. This is the beginning of finals weeks for the students and graduation is scheduled for a week from tomorrow. Obviously classes are cancelled today and there is another prayer service on campus at noon. I am convinced that our prayers for this generation are vital.

God's grace and mercy be with us all.

#prayforSPU
#standinginthegap
#1000gifts